Monday, May 05, 2014

Modesty and My Changing Wardrobe

I approach this subject with a humble heart, as I know that it is one that can be deemed legalistic--and at one time, I was of that legalistic mindset myself.  It is a topic of women's studies that, unfortunately, is not "studied" enough.  In my personal experience, I hear the words, "But we're free!" to balk at even the idea of women dressing any way other than the way our cultural trends promote.

About three years ago, I had a conversation among friends (all young women) about the topic of modesty.  We learned that the way we display ourselves (the way we dress) is an outward reflection of what is on the inside.  Just like the words that we speak are an outward expression of our hearts (Matthew 12:34)--so is our appearance.

We walked through many perspectives, including the history of our culture, our own upbringings (such as playing sports), and, of course, we talked about Biblical references.  We even talked about (gulp)...the skirts vs. pants debate.

It was a popular topic then, at least in all the blogs I followed, and it was so interesting to me that all of the bloggers who shared their studies on the subject were choosing to wear skirts.  But, even though I was seeing their posts, it was a subject I had just not really thought about much until this group study.  I was not choosing to wear revealing clothes at the time, so I suppose I did not see a need to study further.

Then I recalled an email conversation with a friend.  My friend, Jillian*, wears skirts all the time--long skirts--in winter and in summer.  I emailed her one day and asked her why she chose to do that, and her reply was so meek and so gentle.  She impacted my thinking that day, and my heart was able to receive it because I was open to hearing what the Lord had to say on the matter.  I'll share her reply with you in just a bit.

At the time of the discussion, we were experiencing a scientific phenomenon that is an unusual occurrence:  the supermoon!  I did not get to see it on the horizon (because we are surrounded by too many trees here at my home)...but saw it in the high night sky.  It was definitely more "super" than usual.  It seemed larger and brighter than ever before on that night!  I even got my oldest son, who was five years old at the time, out of bed, so that he could see! 

As he and I stood alone in our driveway at around midnight, I told him about how the moon shines by reflecting the light of the sun, which is on the other side of the world.  On that side of the earth, the sun was shining and it was day!  But on our side of the earth, it would be darkness, if not for the reflection of the sun's light on the moon.  I explained that Jesus is the light of the world (John 8:12), and that each of us is like a moon reflecting His light on this dark world.  It is true--this world is dark.  There is so much evil and sin.  I know it breaks the heart of our Father in heaven, for it breaks mine and I'm only human. 

I explained to him how we have to have Jesus' light in us so that we can reflect it onto the earth.  In other words, and I paraphrase, we have to receive God's Truth and then SHOW it to the world!

So my friend, Jillian, replied to my question about wearing skirts with this:

"I do always wear a long skirt. It has been a 'journey' of sorts to get to that place. Seven years ago, when I got married, I was anything but modest. My wedding gown was strapless. I wore tight jeans, short skirts, halter tops. I loved getting male attention, and I secretly loved it that other women were jealous of me. I just shake my head when I think back to how vain I was and how much I liked the fact that I caused other men to lust. Anyway, God's grace is so good. 

"Well, shortly after I got married, I started feeling like I needed to be more modest for the respect of my husband. He never asked me to, but it was something I felt I needed to do. I guess I would call it "convicted". It started out that I gave away all my halter tops, spaghetti strap tanks, tight pants and short skirts. I still wore pants though - just looser pants than I had previously worn. 

"Well, about 2 years after that, I started noticing how other women were dressed, and I noticed that even when they were wearing loose pants, the outline of their bum was still very visible, and their crotch area looked so exposed  as compared to a woman wearing a long skirt. Which is what led me to start wearing skirts most of the time. For a while, I still wore pants occasionally, but the longer I wore mostly skirts, the more "exposed" I felt when wearing pants. And now, I have not worn pants for over a year."

 Now, let me clear up the picture you have in your head about Jillian.  She is not wearing what Carolyn wore in "Little House on the Prairie".  She is wearing modern skirts, tops, and dresses. So, I'm not talking about denim jumpers everyday...just so you know!

As I began to study modesty for myself, the first question I asked was, "Why do I dress the way that I do?"  No matter what that is...a dress, pants, shorts, swimsuit, pajamas...WHY is it what I wear?

So I begin by asking you to consider for yourself...why do you wear what you wear?  Is it because you were taught to dress that way growing up?  Is it because it is how your friends dress?  Is it the cultural trend?  Is it because God has given you a standard to dress by?  Or maybe, like myself back then, do you not know your why on this subject?  I believe that knowing why you choose a certain garment is quite possibly more important than the garment itself.  We will all stand before our Lord and Master and answer only for ourselves, so let's choose based on what HE tells us above all other influence.

As I studied prior to the discussion among ladies, I found these verses to get me started:

"In like manner, also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation; not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works."  1 Timothy 2:9-10

"A woman shall not wear anything that pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman's garment, for all who do so are an abomination to the Lord your God."  Deuteronomy 22:5

First, let's look at the Old Testament passage from Deuteronomy.  Yes--this is Old Testament.  But let's examine this passage from the perspective of God's chosen people.  This is God telling them that He would be disgusted by a man dressing like a woman, or a woman dressing like a man.  He created them "male and female"...and there are many differences.  I will not go on with that in this post, but you can pick up an anatomy book or a psychology book and find all the evidence you need.  But the definition of abomination from Strong's Concordance is "something disgusting" and "an abhorrence".  I simply believe that the Lord wants us to be the male and female He created us to be--we are not both.  We are what He made us, and He has clearly defined what manhood and womanhood is what He wants FOR us.

Now let's look at the verse in 1 Timothy.  In our English Bibles, the words we are given read "modest apparel".  The Greek text is kosmios katastole, which mean a garment that is put in order, and "of good behavior".  Most describe this text to mean, "not drawing attention to oneself". 

Going back to the beginning of the Word, we see that when Adam and Eve were naked and unashamed.  Then, when found to have sinned, they covered themselves--basically covered their "private areas"--I imagine like a swimsuit bottom might cover.  God came and saw them and covered them further with animal skins.

So why did the Lord cover them further?  I believe it may have been because they were not going to be in the Garden of Eden any longer--they were "kicked out" into the world!  They were going to need covering there!  In Eden, it was a man and his wife, between whom nakedness is not forbidden.

Also--Isaiah 47:2-3 says, "uncover the thigh...your nakedness shall be uncovered".  Nakedness = showing the thigh??  How much MORE do we see in this world??  Yow.

I read a book several months ago that was called, "Christian Modesty:  The Public Undressing of America".  It was so very enlightening!  Shocking is a better word.  Very informative.

Another story that comes to mind is the story of the time surrounding World War 2 (WWII).  (I'll shorten the story for the sake of this post.)  When Pearl Harbor was bombed, the men left to go to war, leaving the women (their wives and sisters and daughters) behind to fill in their jobs.  They did this out of necessity.
When the survivors returned, the men expected things to go back to the way they had been--men worked to provide and the women were homemakers.  But some of the women had joined a movement known to us now as feminism, and began to fight for their "rights".

What rights did they want?  They wanted the right to work jobs and make their own money.  They wanted the right to be the head of their own households.  They wanted the right to wear pants.

Before this movement, it was generally known/accepted, that pants were a man's garment and that skirts and dresses were a woman's garment.  We can look back over centuries and see that this is true in our country.  But at this point in time, women began to wear pants, too.  So, the "freedom" to wear pants and the cultural garments we see in stores today come from the feminist movement.  The same movement that tells a woman not to submit to her husband.  The same movement that turned the hearts of these women toward serving themselves and their own desires more than serving their husbands--or even serving the Lord as keepers at home.  (And that same movement today presses for the right to abort unborn babies.) 

When I have on pants, I am reminded of this movement of women who fought against God's high and holy calling to be female, and I know I'm wearing pants because of them.  If we had been living just 70 years ago, we would be wearing only dresses, because that was the standard that our culture held at the time.  It was more closely based on God's Word back then than it is today!  Today, it is based on legal freedoms given to us by man and by government.  (And just a note:  the freedom our country currently allows is NOT the same as "freedom in Christ"!)

Okay--so let me give you some interesting tidbits that I found in my study, then I'll wrap up with my personal conclusion. 

Some things to think about:
*Pants are a symbol of authority:  The saying one person "wears the pants in this family”…refers to the one taking the lead…and that role has been given by the Lord to men and husbands.

*International symbols for bathrooms:  You see a figure in pants for the Men's Room and a figure in a dress for the Ladies' Room in most places still today.

*The focus point in different garments:  In pants, the "arrow" points to the bum or to the crotch area, for a man AND woman.  Eyes are naturally drawn to where this arrow points.  In a skirt or dress, the eyes follow the arrow all the way up to the face.  I was SHOCKED to find this is so true!

*A pointed story:  There was a fashion show years ago on the Phil Donahue show where a designer created dresses for men and had them parade on the stage in them.  Here are the comments that came out of it:  “that’s disgusting”, “that’s vulgar”, “gross”, etc.  Phil Donahue’s response was, “That’s funny…because about 50 years ago, people said the same thing about women wearing pants.”

So, for almost 6,000 years, women have worn only long flowing garments (in today's language:  dresses)…and around 70 years ago is when women started wearing pants?  Just a tidbit.

And yes...I'm aware that for many years, both men AND women wore some sort of "robe".  But we must assume one of two things, using the verse I mentioned above from Deuteronomy--either (1) their robes were different somehow back then, to give distinction between a man's and a woman's attire...OR (2) that one day, the attire would be different for men and women, so the Lord addressed it back then.  Either way, He wants us dressing distinctly as "male" and "female".

This is our heavenly Father telling us what He wants FOR us, not what He wants FROM us.  The Old Testament gives us so many things to help us understand the heart of our Father!  I view this passage as if it was my husband talking to our sweet daughter, as she came downstairs before going somewhere with friends.  If she was wearing something that made her look like a man or that he considered inappropriate for her, he would surely take her on his lap and say, "My sweet daughter, it is a cruel, evil, hard world out there.  I can't let you parade yourself out there like this.  It isn't good for you to be looked upon the way you will be in that outfit--nor is it good for those looking to look at you in that way.  I must insist that you cover yourself more fully to keep yourself pure, and to help your brothers remain pure, too."  (Because ANY man who isn't my husband, is my brother in Christ.  And as his sister, he shouldn't look on me that way.)  God's ways are protection for us, too--not rules alone.  He knows what is BEST for us.

I truly believe that is what our Father in heaven would say if He looked at many of us today.  Beach season is upon us--and I wrote this post to share my heart to young women of today.  But it isn't just at the beach.  It is everywhere we go--and especially when we come together to worship.

My personal conclusion is this:

*I cannot throw out all of my clothes because I cannot afford to do so.  But I do aim to wear more skirts and dresses.  Not because of a "law" that I have to--but because God wants me to be modest in my attire, and I have found that longer skirts and dresses draw the least amount of attention to my body.  I'm not talking burkas here...just long, loose garments (that at least cover the thigh).

*Since I am married, I know that I have the freedom to wear anything I want to (or nothing at all) around my own husband.  But I consider my responsibility to you and YOUR husband a grand act of love--to lay down what I may WANT to wear, and wear what I should around him.  You are my sister and he is my brother, and I do not want to have any part in coming between you two as husband and wife.  I have seen with my own eyes the husband of a friend look on another woman while in church who was dressed without a standard of modesty.  I have seen the hurt that comes from a man looking lustfully on another woman.  I am just doing what I can to NOT be that "other woman".    So please, before you think I dress in a skirt to appear "holier-than-thou", please remember that I do it for YOU just as much as I do it for the Lord.

*I also aim to set an example to my daughter (who happens to refuse to wear anything but a "pretty dress"), and also to my sons--for what to look for in a woman adorning herself appropriately for a "woman professing godliness".

*Will you see me in pants sometimes--yes--but they will be loose and not form-fitting in ANY way.  And I'll typically wear those in groups of only women.

*Will you see me in shorts?  Rarely, if ever.  I think I only own one pair of exercise shorts and that's it.  You may see me in capri pants this summer as I'm working in the yard, though. 

*Will you see me in a swimsuit?  Not likely.  ONLY in a group of only women, and even then, probably with some kind of coverup.  If we do end up at a pool, it would be with a longer swim short and swim shirt. 

The bottom line for me is that I believe the Lord wants me to wear what is decidedly female and surely modest.  If it is not both of those things, I'll have to replace that item in my closet.

I suppose I should also say this:  If I see YOU in pants, please know that it never crosses my mind to judge you for that.  This is my standard given to me by my Lord and Master.  "Who am I to judge another master's servant?"  (Romans 14:4)

And finally--just a few tips when choosing apparel:  Watch out for skirts that come up too high when you sit down, waistlines that show "crack" when you lean over to pick up your Bible, tight pants that leave nothing to the imagination, low cut tops that show cleavage, skin tight tops that show your form, and even baggy armpits on tops that allow a "peek" of what is underneath.  Those are for your husband--not mine.  And if you are not yet married--remember that all of these men are your brother! 

One more thought that guides my heart in every matter...  I've heard my pastor say to RUN from the line--not live on the edge trying not to cross it.  Instead of seeing what we can "get away with" according to Scriptures, why not see just how closely we can get to the heart of the Lord by obeying Him more fully?

I welcome your comments.  I do ask that you keep them respectful.  This is a post where I share what my convictions are, based on studying His Word, and to offer scripture to study and tips to help you choose garments--but not tell you what to wear.  I only hope that you will seek out His Word and ask Him what He would have you to wear.

*Name changed for privacy, only because I did not get permission from this friend to use her real name in this post before the date and time to publish. 


  1. Amen to this post!! I've worn skirts and dresses all my life. But the question is why do you dress the way you do?? <---- I think that's the question people need to ask if they are thinking of becoming modest women.

    1. Thank you for reading, Zipporah A! Glad to know I'm in encouraging company regarding this topic! :) --Melissa

  2. I recently did a couple posts on my blog about these things.

    1. Thank you, Moriah! I'll be reading your posts now! :) --Melissa

  3. I really enjoyed this post. I, too, have been feeling this way lately.

    1. Thank you, Tiffany! And thank you for reading! :) --Melissa

  4. great post! I have commented before but had to delete my blog due to privacy reasons. I wear a mixture of pants and skirts but I love skirts especially in the summer time. They make me feel so feminine and lovely. I do have a question, what are your views or are you going to do a post on birth control? I am asking as a somewhat neutral party, we do not believe in hormonal birth control but are using NFP to space our babies. so far our views on biblical womanhood are very similar so I was just curious. :)

    1. Hi, "Anonymous"! :) Thank you for reading and for your comment! I WILL be doing a post on the subject of birth control. It is a subject near to my heart, actually. I'll try to get that published SOON! :) --Melissa

  5. Thanks for this post. I'm not at a point of agreeing with everything you've said, I'm open to the thoughts you've presented. Truth be told, I'm just a whole lot more comfortable in jeans and I actually think that when I add a nice top and shoes I can end up looking much more feminine than what some women show up looking like in their skirts and tennis shoes. (that sounded snarky, I didn't mean it that way.) And I'm a socks and shoes kind of girls so that works way better with jeans.
    I tried wearing skirts around the house and it lasted one day. Wow, it got in the way, had to hold it going up steps, etc. and oh I hate to feel my thighs touch! So, I'm wondering, do you have any advice on how to get around those issues if I want to at least start wearing skirts more often?

    1. As someone who is kind of in the middle with long skirts and jeans, I've found that tunic tops meet this need PERFECTLY!!! I wear mostly skirts when I'm out, so I feel REALLY exposed just wearing jeans. With what my husband does and even my occasional projects in his shop, I'd prefer to wear a pair of pants for convenience and actually modesty when I'm crawling around. I've found that I'm MUCH more comfortable wearing a long top or jumper that's about thigh length or knee length. That way I'm covered up, but still feminine! I accidentally discovered this last fall when I bought a really cute corduroy jumper (thrifting with a friend! lol), but I didn't feel modest wearing it with tights or leggings. But with jeans it was perfect!

      So that was just my experience! Hope that helps!

    2. Hi Beth! April does have a wonderful suggestion above my comment! I can tell you that I grew up in jeans and windsuit pants--because I played sports--so I understand completely that moving toward skirts is a process. And take it as slowly as you need to. ONE tip: don't start with super-long skirts. I mean, don't pick mini-skirts! But calf-length or skirts that come to just below the knees are MUCH easier to navigate stairs and such while wearing. I do have longer skirts, and yes--I do have to lift them to do stairs--and yes, it gets easier with practice. :) Regarding the thighs touching--again, totally understand! In cold weather temps, leggings are the way to go. In summer temps, perhaps a lace legging or similar would help--or a pair of thin, lightweight shorts underneath. I'll be looking for some more options myself now that it is turning warmer here in Alabama! Also--I don't wear tennis shoes with the skirts I have. I have a couple pairs of slip-on flats and I'll put a pair of boots under some of my skirts in the fall/winter. Of course, flip-flops are often the way to go in the summer! :) I'll have to do a post on shoes to wear with skirts--and include some pictures! :) --Melissa

  6. I think what is and is not considered feminine and modest is completely cultural. If you are holding yourself to pre-WW2 standards, it would be considered scandalous to let your ankles show! In Iran you could be fined or imprisoned for showing your hands!
    To not wear jeans because it points to your crotch is silly. You said yourself that pants "point" to your crotch whether you are a man or a woman. So it is OK for me to know your husband has a bum to sit on, but it is not OK for him to see that I walk on two legs? Perhaps we should go way, way back and have the men wear skirts too! Then nobody has crotches!
    I am not saying that women should let it all hang out and show the world what color bra and panty set they are wearing today. But decently cut jeans, designed for a woman, with a loose tee shirt is just as modest, and actually calls LESS attention to yourself than wearing long flowing skirts 24/7. I come from that culture. I used to wear nothing but ankle length skirts until I realized that men are way less interested in my calves than the conservative church makes them out to be. I see people staring a whole lot more at a family of women walking around the store with sneakers and jean skirts than any other family wearing "normal" stuff.
    It wasn't practical when doing the things that I love (bike riding, hiking in the wilderness, exercising) to wear long skirts. It actually was less modest when a blustery wind came by! :-P
    I guess my point is this: wear what is practical. Look like a good girl. Don't draw undue attention to yourself, whatever you are wearing. That is the spirit of the law.

    1. I do hope that you read ALL of my post. Especially the part where I said I would be dressed occasionally in other garments besides just a skirt. I am not of the legalistic mindset that it HAS to be a skirt only. I encourage everyone to talk to God and seek out scriptures for themselves. I only hope this post helps women think about what they wear.

    2. Oh yes, but only around other women, only baggy, and only rarely. Because men shouldn't see you in pants for some reason?
      Believe me, I really did used to be part if the drapery crowd, but it was my HUSBAND who asked me to please stop dressing so dowdy, please wear clothes that don't make me roast in the summer, and to please stop over thinking my wardrobe. Because, as a man, and a husband, he assuredly would not want me to dress to attract another man, but he most certainly didn't want me to hide every part of me just because I am female. Believe me, he would let me know if my calves were turn ons to other guys or if I needed to cover up my assets. He is a jealous kind of guy. So yeah. I just think people put entirely too much emphasis on the clothing length, breadth, and is it "feminine enough." And most of the emphasis should be on the gentle and quiet spirit. Men are told to be modest too. It is a virtue, a character trait, not a set of rules about clothing.

  7. Melissa, I found this post to be very well written. I like how you repeated several times that this is your understanding of Scripture, and how you feel led by God to present yourself. Of course, there are other people who disagree (often vehemently and rudely), but you come across kindly and clearly that these are your convictions.

    I have also gone through a transition to more modest clothing over the past few years. I look back at photos of me at a younger age and blush! One thing (other than Scripture and how I believe God is leading me) that helps me judge attire is the following quote: "Wear clothes that are tight enough to show you are a woman and loose enough to show you are a lady." I have no idea who originated the quote, but it has stuck with me!

    I think some of the push-back on ladies who prefer skirts/modest apparel comes from others who are struggling and don't want to give up control in any part of their lives. After all, if we let God change us in this area, what else might he require of us?!?! (smile)

    This is a volatile topic in our society, and again, I applaud you for the kind, balanced way you presented your take on it. Stay the course, sister!

    1. Thank you for your kind words, Bronda! And of course, for reading! :) --Melissa

  8. Thanks for this post! I am not a regular blog reader, even tho I am subscribed to your blog! This always resonates with me, tho. The balance between modesty and practicality. I wear a lot of long skirts, especially during the summer. In winter I get a bit more mixed in my wardrobe because it's hard to get enough layers under a skirt to keep warm. I commented to another reader above because I recently delved into tunic length or knee length tops for over pants, capris, or jeans and it has CHANGED MY LIFE! lol I like to have my bum covered. Not that I'm vain enough to worry about anyone checking it out, but because I have grown into modesty gradually in my adult life. I have found this deals with the issue (at least for me) of being conspicuous and remaining modest, if you aren't comfortable wearing pants straight up.

    1. Thank you, April! I haven't purchased many tunics--but I will head to a store soon to give them a try on! :) --Melissa

  9. Thanks for such a well thought out article.

  10. I appreciated this post very much. I have been trying to wear skirts and long shirts but have struggled to do this in a practical way. I enjoy raising poultry and find it very hard to do chores in a skirt. I also can not shovel snow in a skirt! Your balanced approach makes sense. I can wear loose fitting jeans at home while working when needed and skirts the rest of the time. Finding long, tunic length tops has been a mission this year for me as well.

    I must say that a light went on for me with the mention of the "arrow" and where it points! Oh my, I never thought of it that way before.

  11. I have a much more conservative heart than my family gives me comfort level to express. :( My dh would find it "odd" if I were to wear just skirts, as would my children (though we all walk by faith). My extended family (parents, siblings and spouses, etc.) would outright judge harshly. Sigh, that I could be supported in my desire.

  12. I appreciate your heart as shared in this post very much. I am always in favor of asking why we do what we do. I must say though that I'm always a bit baffled as to why the modesty debate always goes to skirts in American culture. Living in a predominantly Muslim country, the conversation is nearly always about headcoverings which I find really ironic since that piece of clothing is actually mentioned in the New Testament whereas skirts/pants are nowhere to be found. That we, as followers of Jesus, have made lack of headcoverings a mark of our faith/freedom and therefore presented a barrier to Muslims when in fact our book speaks only favorably of them further baffles me. Meanwhile, we argue about skirts. Sigh.

  13. This is a wonderful post. Thank you for sharing and for echoing what's in my own heart. At 43 I'm only now beginning to appreciate the beauty of modesty and am gradually phasing out jeans and pants. It's worth mentioning that the first time I put on a long skirt for church, my husband was so incredibly complimentary that I never wanted to take it off, as were my two daughters who, by my example, I pray will ease into a more modest wardrobe as well. It is challenging to put aside habits of dressing that have been with you for a lifetime, but the more I actaully *do* everything God's word instructs, the more I see His face and experience His grace in my life. Thank you again for sharing your heart. Blessings, Courtney

  14. What are some guidelines for finding modest pants?

    1. Hello! While there is no Bible verse to point to, the few pants I own are more loose in fit. They do not "hug" my figure. My favorite pair of jeans ever were carpenter jeans that looked more like a skirt around my hips than pants. Of course, they are hard to find these days. The legs were obviously separated, but it fit around my waist and hung down my bottom and thighs loosely. Also, the crotch area did not come up super high and tight, so as to leave nothing to the imagination. That's another reason why I like skirts better! They don't "ride up"--which is important to me for both comfort and not showing off my total figure. :) Does that help? --Melissa

  15. Although iv been a professing Christian for 7 years here recently iv joined a more bible teaching church and I have grown a lot in my faith in the last year. My unbelieving family has definitely taken notice and transitioning away from them has been difficult. My sisters had gotten me a ticket to see dirty dancing and while they were thinking of a great movie we had all watched as kids, I really struggled with how to handle the situation as my relationship with one of my sisters has been kinda rocky, after the show was over they wanted to go out to eat and the only places open were bars. I had felt convicted in my past to not only wear a long skirt all the time, but also to wear a head covering while in church. I stopped doing so after hearing a few people talk about why a skirt isn't nessacary and such. However not long before going to the show with my sisters I had felt convicted again. While at the show, I was wondering.. If I was wearing a long skirt and a head covering would they still think this is something I would be interested in? Then I started to notice my attire was not all that different then the women around me, skinny jeans, or shorter skirts, hugging shirts... And I realized I fight right in with the crowd that was ok and comfortable and maybe even in agreement too with watching sex scenes and abortions in a play. I was sorta glad then that I didn't "look" like a Christian because I didn't want to represent Christ the way I was..or doing what I was doing, I was completely ashamed. And I wondered if my dress was more of an outward expression of my faith maybe they would have known this wasn't me anymore. After all I am a new creature in Christ. And I should be representing him always. I don't know if the lord calls everyone to dress in a skirt or to cover their head, but I do feel like he is calling me to do this as an outward expression of my faith, and to maintain modesty. So about 2 days after that event... (I repented right away but the clothing change waited) I wore a long skirt, and went to our nearest goodwill to see what they had to offer. And I found a nice heavy, plain, long skirt. And a cute but conservative top. And my mom came to visit me with her friend and her friend later asked my mom if had given up wearing pants. My mom told her "oh no she wears pants!" And brought up the convo to me later. She said," well she asked because a lot of homeschool moms don't wear pants and some Christians don't." I said well actually... I have decided to wear skirts more often. I couldn't believe how quickly the lord had sent confirmation. I am a Christian homeschooling mom.. Why not dress like one! If I were a ceo of a company I would dress like one! Why not let my clothing choices say what's true about me.. And my guess is I'll start being treated like a Christian from my family/strangers ect. Iv been praying that the lord will help me be bold in my faith and in professing him. And just doing what he calls me to do, had I done it to begin with it probably would have saved me from that night of uncomfortable and awkwardness. Anyway.. Sorry that was so long! Thank you for this blog. Iv been trying to explain to some of my Christian friends that my wearing a skirt doesn't mean I'm judging them for not. This is a personal conviction the lord has laid on my heart and I don't want to disobey.

  16. I live in Northern Ireland. I believe that Christian women should dress modestly, and modesty to me means loose clothing, long clothing (well below the knee)and high necklines. You mentioned that you saw your friend's husband looking at an immodest woman in church. Did your friend see her husband look at that provocative woman? If not, did you tell her that her husband sinned with his eyes? Perhaps the elders need to speak to him about his behaviour because looking can lead to lust and lust can lead to adultery. I have seen men who call themselves Christians look at immodest women and it disturbs me greatly. Such men know that they should guard their eyes. By the way, I am 57 years old and my husband and I have one child only and she is 17.

  17. Hi. How are you. I too am starting this journey into modesty. I am learning so much. From a Jewish girl's perspective (me) , I do see the reasoning behind it all. I used to dress horribly improper and the closer I get to Adonai and follow Y'shua's teachings the more I was convicted to follow tznius (modesty in hebrew). Thank you for your post. I greatly appreciate reading about it. :-) I still find it difficult to wear skirts when I go hiking and to theme parks, but your idea of wearing long shirts over loose pants really is a good idea. Thank you.


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